Friday, September 26, 2008

Happy Joel's Super Fun Time Weblog


Now here's an artist one can admire and respect. This post goes out to Joel Ross, founder of Happy Joel's Super Fun Time Weblog and professional contest entry winner at large. Allow me to explain. Joel likes entering online video contests. After winning a few $100K contests, he decided to turn it into his day job. And the videos are pretty out there. I'd describe them as cult classics best enjoyed by those who embody great whimsy and flair (i.e. myself, Ms. Peep Show Hall-a-Thon, hired publicist of Joe Samsonite). At the very least, I would recommend these videos to groups of people on Speed or some other mind-altering substance (not that I endorse such measures, but hey, this is America).

I'll let you decide for yourself.

According to his site, Joel lived in Dayton, Ohio, until the age of 18. He works on an average of 7-8 contests at a time - some involving monetary prizes, others a lifetime supply of chocolate milk.

The way I see it, learning to get people to vote for me in online video contests and building my contest army is just to pave the way for my eventual run for President of the United States.

Click my links, join my contest voting army, help me live the dream.
One of my co-workers knows Happy Joel and told me the story behind these mug shots. Once a cop tried pulling Joel over for speeding. Joel wanted to wait until he reached town because he heard it was dangerous to stop for one car in a rural area* Eventually, an entire squad of police cars followed him into town on a low speed chase. When he got out of his car, the cops said something to the effect of "What happened?" Then they all burst into laughter.

*The rule is to not pull over for unmarked police cars in rural areas, and to dial #77 when doing so.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Live from Santa Monica

Wooo!

So I'm sitting here in a hotel room on the West Coast, pondering how to spend the rest of my day. Here for work, I just finished the hardcore training aka sales megaconference portion of the trip. My flight doesn't leave until tomorrow so I think I'll just idle the day away... staring at...the ocean! I can see it from my balcony window (sorta). As I anticipated, Cali has been idyllic and nothing less than awesome. Monday and Tuesday were literally booked from the time I woke up down to the minutes I grew too tired to hold a salty margarita. But not to fear, we managed to squeeze in some fun betwixt all the chaos... fo' sho'.

At first, Los Angeles reminded me of Jersey with a lot of palm trees. I think it was all the flat buildings and stale surroundings. But everything got better once I saw the ocean. The clean, tropical smell in the air replaced thoughts of Jersey with thoughts of Florida. Unlike muggy Fla., mornings here have been foggy and cool - the beach photo above was taken at noon.

Last night, bleary-eyed after a day spent staring at PowerPoint slides, our sales crew of 50 people headed to this awesome Mexican restaurant in Santa Monica, El Cholo. Afterward, most of us headed to a chi chi bar across the street, Temple. Old School jazz tunes circa 1930 filtered through the club from Suzy and the Solid Senders. Solid they were. A few minutes into the night, this random guy came up to me and asked, "Are you Laura from __(insert fictitious company name here)__ ?" Umm, no. I spotted a few co-workers across the room and slowly headed their way for safety.

As for the rest of the evening, good times all around.

Friday, September 19, 2008

My Job Rocks

"Here a news flash for you: college kids is po."

Haha, no, actually: I have the coolest job ever.

Not only are they flying me to L.A. this weekend for training, where I'll be staying at a ritzy hotel in Santa Monica, but I get to work with some of the most interesting characters.

I had such a crazy time last night hanging out with my new office peeps. I'd love to tell you about it, but as it involves the imbibing of beverages and other incriminating events I have to keep the details under wraps. Suffice it to say I'm really enjoying myself, and the end of last night went something like this:

I experienced one of those classic NY moments. Sitting in the taxi next to RedSunRover on our way to Brooklyn, I stared at the skyline looming in front of us, savoring one of the last few warm nights in the City. I felt the fullness of being wined and dined like a rock star. My former travails with the roaches and the pyscho cat wench and the pot smoking roomate suddenly seemed far far away.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

I'm Still Here...Promise

I know it's been a while since I last blogged, and I feel terrible about it, especially since there are so many things going on that I want to talk about. Where to start. First off, I started my new job at a Dot Com, and things are going pretty well so far. The office is predominantly male, which leads me to believe my in-depth discussion of the Brett Favre Saga in my interview probably helped more than I thought. It's not the first time I've relied on the Packers as a conversation piece. About a year ago, I got stuck discussing the offensive line with a slew of cops in the subway station while they were giving me a ticket.

Cop 1: "Can I see your driver's license, m'am?"
(Me handing it over, pissed that I actually got caught trying to squeeze through the turnstyle with a friend)
Cop 2: "Wisconsin, heh?"
Cop 3: "You a Packers fan?"
Me: "Yeah."
Cop 2: "They have a pretty good offensive line, don't they?"
Me: "Yeah. They're really young."
(I refused to add any further commentary)
Cop 3: "What about Ryan Grant, he's pretty good."
Me: "Yeah, he is."
Cop 4: "Do you own a cheese hat?"
(I am officially insulted.)
Me: "ACTUALLY, it's common knowledge that people from Green Bay don't usually wear cheese hats. They're more popular with fans from Milwaukee and Chicago."
Cop 4: "Oh...Well, sorrr-y"

That's pretty much end of story. What would have been a very awkward 10 minutes of silence concluded by me getting slammed with a $60 city summons became an annoying (yet harmless) forum entailing idiot New Yorkers discuss a team they know nothing about. Telling off Cop 4 was totally worth the $60. Haha.

And on that note:
Have a great day~

Friday, September 5, 2008

Hearts

Later kids -- I'm outta this City for an extended vacay in America's Dairy Land. As luck would have it, I'm going to hit both my hometown's annual Dairy Fest and the football season opener. Not too shabby. 

My sister made fun of me today for sounding British on the phone -- maybe I'm unconsciously trying to counteract my bumpkin accent ("Well, I reeally doan't knoa what to saaey...") Or maybe it's because I'm reading Mansfield Park for the second time around. So I made a point to daintily clutch RedSun's arm earlier today, saying very aristocratically, "Let us venture forth into this street."

(Thanks Uncle Bob for the photo)

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

How I Survived Hurricane Bing, Cont.

So maybe my weekend wasn't quite as stressful as a Category 6 Hurricane. But I'm of the belief that first impressions are the longest lasting, and I was bound and determined to make a good one. So I spent the day before their arrival making the apartment shiny and well-stocked with "mother approved" food. I was soo glad our roach problem had been resolved -- a few months ago a thriving family of roaches took up residence in everything from our bed to the kitchen counters. During this time we were also without a fridge because the old one stopped working and our landlords are flakey (Getting it replaced turned out to be a good thing, as the old one had roach eggs embedded in the top folds of the freezer door. The microwave faced a similar fate). I hope you're not eating while reading this.

Back to the parents. In the days leading up to their arrival, they started calling a lot, and I had a feeling they were going to be very "involved" aka smothering. I've been told that Asian parents are a lot like Jewish parents -- frugal, doting and very proactive in their childrens' education. My parents rarely call and have always let me do my own thing, one reason why I grew up to be a self-sufficient little lady. But I knew Mrs. B was slightly torn about RedSun not dating a nice Asian girl: "I don't mind, but if I had my druthers..."

The Parents arrived with several gifts in tow: a box of chocolates, fruit bars, trail mix, Bed Bath and Beyond coupons, moon cakes, rice pockets (pronounced: "Doong"). All seemed well when I met his mother and she hugged me rather than shook my outstretched hand. Mr. B -- who has a very heavy southern accent -- came across as jovial and easy going. RedSun later told me he could sense his father's approval. As the weekend progressed, Mr. B and I formed a bond over our love of coffee and sweets first thing in the morning.

Within a day, Mr. and Mrs. B revamped our fridge to include a highly organized system of fresh produce and other properly arranged foods. They continually fretted over RedSun's recent weight gain and his predisposition to high blood pressure *Cue disapproving glances toward RedSun's midsection* They also bought me a pair of headphones after overhearing me tell RedSun I needed a new set. And they bought paper towels. And a new mini garbage for our bathroom (a South Dakota mate puked in ours one week previous).

Only in rare moments did I feel annoyed: once, when RedSun's mom rearranged the kitchen -- "But where do you put the wet dishes??" *disapproving glance* Of course, everything was put back in place the moment they left for Memphis. Next - the parents' desire to eat semi-authentic Asian food for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I can only take about one or two Asian meals a week before I peace out. We managed to find a middle ground. Lastly - and this one really isn't her fault - Mrs. B reminded me of a former high school boyfriend's mother, who once "stumbled on" an important diary we kept, and then proceeded to read its passages. Both moms came across as very smiley and friendly, but the friendliness always makes me wonder whether they approve or it's all a facade to keep their baby boys happy.

On a scale of 1 to 5, with 1 being the Manson family and 5 being the Cleavers, I'd rate the Bing Peeps a 4.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

How I Survived Hurricane Bing

RedSunRover and I were on our best behavior this weekend as a highly volatile storm system - now classified as a Category 6 on the domestic scale of storm fronts - descended on our tiny apartment. In other words, Mama and Papa Bing (The Parents) came for a little visit.

I am happy to report I survived the weekend with only a few mental bruises and elbow scrapes.

Before I recap the weekend, allow me to shed some light on a few factoids:
1. RedSun is the only child and Erin is the eldest of two siblings.
2. RedSun is Asian; Erin's roots are of a feisty Irish/German persuasion.
3. Erin is a neat freak.
4. RedSun has a more "relaxed" approach to what qualifies as clean.
5. Erin grew up staging stuffed animal weddings and fake church ceremonies in the heartland of Wisconsin; RedSun grew up experimenting with firecrackers on the mean streets of Memphis.
6. RedSun's parents call every couple of days; Erin's parents call once every two to three weeks.
7. RedSun will eat anything, including rice every day of the week; Erin follows a strict diet of cheese, milk, bagels and meat. Repeat.

To be continued....

(photo via This Is Glamorous)